With my 38th birthday fast approaching, I find myself reflecting on my journey and the many things I’ve learned and lost along the way. Although this journey has been a rollercoaster ride, and I have definitely experienced many highs and lows, I’ve also realized that the life I’ve lived is designed for the strongest warrior and the most durable yet delicate soul. I am grateful to have experienced all the love, hate, and support that have shaped my life and transformed me into the bold, courageous, and sophisticated person I have become.
When I think back on my childhood and my entry into this world, I should have known from my birth story that my journey would not be ordinary. I would be the one to choose the road less traveled and seek a different path from those who came before me. From the very beginning, my entrance into the world was not only chaotic and dramatic but, ironically enough, elegantly stylish.
Picture this: It’s 1986 on a random but not-so-random Wednesday night. It’s the midnight hour, and the rain is pouring down furiously as a black BMW speeds through the streets of Crown Heights, Brooklyn, New York, breaking all the red lights in a hurry to reach the hospital before the woman in the backseat gives birth to her second child. Upon arrival at the hospital, the nurses and doctors rush out in droves to assist the pregnant woman in labor with a stretcher and blankets to prepare for delivery. But to everyone’s surprise, the baby has already arrived, ready to be snipped, cleaned, and praised for her cuteness and the hard work of delivering herself on her exact due date. Precision was the goal, and Sunny is her name.
Determined and obviously eager to enter the world, my experience thus far has been very similar to my entrance: dramatic, chaotic, and divinely ordered. My journey has not always been easy, but it has definitely been worth it. I’ll share with you some of the most valuable lessons I had to learn the hard way.
1.Good things happen to those who go after what they want, not to those who wait.
2.Pay attention to patterns in your life, it’s the universe communicating with you.
3.Happiness is a choice. You should choose it daily.
4.The way you dress determines how people will treat you.
5.Don’t tell anyone all your secrets (not even to your “best friend”) you may be telling it to a secret enemy.
6.People will show you exactly how they feel about you through playful jokes.
7.Anything that disturbs your peace was not sent by god. Remove it.
8.Spend the money, the experience will be worth it and you’ll make the money back.
9.Gratitude is the secret sauce to getting more of what you deserve.
10.Confidence and courage can get you anything you want. Just keep asking.
11.Femininity is power and Masculinity is strength, a balance of the two is the key to success.
12.Failure is important to succeed. You can’t have one without the other. It’s a part of the game.Keep going. It’s how you’ll turn into a beast.
13.Not all people are bad, just very few are good.
14.Calling off for a mental health day is essential. Fuck that job.
15.Take a risk or two while you’re young. It’ll be some of your best stories when you’re older.
16.Sugar is delicious, but it is the devil. Avoid it.
17.Don’t force anything. If it doesn’t flow, let it go. It’s not for you.
18.When a person shows you who they are, believe them the first time.
19.Love yourself first. You create a miserable experience when you don’t.
20.Boundaries are important for EVERY relationship.
21.Life is a strategy game. It’s chess not checkers. Know your position.
22.Magic is real. Tap in.
23.Be someone’s blessing if you have the ability to do so. But knowing when to say no is equally as important.
24.Speak nicely to yourself always.
25.Learning to detach from people and things will save you plenty of heartache.
26.You’ll never have to question good energy, it’s usually consistent even on a bad day.
27.Crying is important for healing. Let that shit out.
28.The person you choose to be with directly correlates to how you feel about yourself.
29.A private life is a happy life.
30.Black sheeps were meant to honor themselves and serve the people.
31.Don’t seek love while seeking success. Love will become a distraction.
32.People who really care about you will hurt when you hurt.
33.Petty people are unhappy people.
34.Positive thoughts will change your experience for the better.
35.Fear is your comfort zone not wanting you to leave.
36.Exercise will improve your body and your mind.
37.Some of the best givers are the worst people. Not everything given is a gift.
38. (Bonus): God will send strangers to help you, the devil will usually send the people closest to you to attack you.
As I approach my 38th birthday, I am reminded of the lessons that have shaped my journey and the resilience that has carried me through. Each experience, whether joyful or challenging, has contributed to my growth and understanding of life. Embracing both the highs and lows has allowed me to cultivate a deeper appreciation for the beauty around me and the strength within me.
As I move forward, I carry these insights close to my heart, ready to face whatever comes next. Life is a continuous journey of learning and evolving, and I am excited to see what lies ahead. I hope that by sharing my reflections, you too can find inspiration to embrace your own path with courage and grace. Here’s to celebrating life, love, and the lessons we learn along the way!
